Sunday, November 2, 2014

My kid got addicted to meth from the Breaking Bad action figures...said no parent ever

We all heard not too long ago about Breaking Bad action figures making it on to Toys R Us shelves. Shortly after we also heard about one Florida mother that was so disgraced about it, she started a petition (and received a whopping 9,000 signatures) to get them removed. I get it, the show was about a drug dealer and the action figure does come with a bag of money and a fake baggie of meth, BUT this was never advertised towards children, and its not like the show was on the Disney Channel. Instead of starting a petition wouldn't it just be easier to NOT buy it for your kid? Do people realize that it's not just kids that but action figures?  I mean I'm 29 years old and I just bought a Rick Grimes action figure. I thought it was funny how appalled this woman was. Think of all the other things they sell at Toys R Us. Violent video games, fake weapons, barbie dolls (that promotes an oh so great body image), and the list goes on. This isn't about the toys out there though.  This is about the parents and the people who need to stop complaining just to complain.  

If you sit back and try to rationalize this just for a second, you will really see how ridiculous it all is.  Lets think about why this Florida mom was upset.  Was she upset about the figure being sold because of the content of the show, because of what the figure came with, or both?  OK so all we really know is that she didn't like it being sold at a toy store.  The "toys" in question were obviously targeted at the fans of the show and not kids.  My questions is did her kid(s) point it out and say "Hey! That's Heisenberg!" or "Hey! That's Pinkman!" yeah I doubt it but there is the possibility that a kid could grab it run to their mom and say "mommy can I get this?  pleeeease? pleeeeease?"  Now brace yourselves because I'm about to share with you one of my biggest secrets as a mother myself.  If your child asks for something that you feel is inappropriate, or something you don't agree with, just say this magical word.  Ready?  NO.  That's right!  You being the parent gives you the right to keep your kids from anything you feel is bad or wrong.  Isn't it crazy?  Need examples?

"Mom, can we get a Happy Meal tonight?"
"Mom, can we get a puppy?"
"Mom, can we live at Disneyland?"

Oh and hey it works for Dads too! Need examples?

"Dad, can I kick my ball by your car?"
"Dad, can I change the channel?"

"Dad, can I have candy before breakfast?"
"NO" (well you're supposed to say no)

It works for "toys" too

"Mom, Dad, can I get this action figure with fake meth and a dufflebag of cash?"  Ready?

Now, maybe there is a legitimate reason this mom and 8,999 other people were so worried about this action figure.  I mean, we should really look into the amount of kids that have turned into meth heads because they got their hands on a Breaking Bad action figure.  Oh that's right, it probably doesn't exist.  I would say this is about as dangerous to our youth as a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle figure that shoots steaming hot pizza.  Why isn't anyone worried about kids grabbing steaming hot pizzas and throwing them at people?  That could cause third degree burns!  Have you ever burned the roof of your mouth from pizza?  Now imagine that all over your face.  You may laugh, but that would be way more realistic than your kid becoming addicted to meth because of an action figure they saw at Toys R Us.  At the end of the day all that Florida mom did was make these incredibly more sought after, more intriguing, and not to mention skyrocket in value.  I know I loved the show, but I hadn't even heard of them until this mom cried about it (now I have two, thanks!).  Surely there is more going on in this world than the non effect this will have on our children. So please lets go back to worrying about REAL issues affecting our kids like starving children, childhood cancer, child abuse, and the releases of "rehabilitated" sex offenders. 


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